7) Lawn Games – no one is going out of their way to buy bocce ball these days, are they? We’re all about boring them from a friend who has their lawn games collecting dust in the shed.
6) Outdoor Kitchens – you think you’re going to use that pizza oven, but alas, the only thing it’s cooking up are spiders and mosquitoes.
5) Weird Shoes – you were feeling fancy and quirky so you picked up a colourful pair of sneakers thinking you’d rock them on a night out – you wore them once and they hurt your feet so now they just live in the front closet
4) Coupon Booklets – If you buy $2000 worth of kitchen appliances you’ll get $200 off a microwave! Keep that one in the junk drawer for a rainy day. Ooooh maybe one day soon here i’ll be close enough to the Mary Browns to get a 2 for 1 Big Mary on a Monday evening between the hours it’s accepted which are only 5-6pm MT. Oh, a bunch of Dairy Queen blizzards going for BOGO? Sign me up! Just kidding – you toss them in the recycling 4 months past their expiration date
3) Cook Books – Nope. Google the recipe. We live in a time where you can even JUMP TO RECIPE. No more scrolling through the chefs entire childhood story of how they used to pretend to bake this pie in the back alley of their home using a bucket, mud and crab apples
2) Wine Cellars – if you’re rich enough to have a wine cellar, aren’t you consuming expensive wine every time your other rich friends come over for caviar? Your wine cellar is just a storage unit for unworn clothing and those weird shoes we were talking about earlier
1 ) Exercise Equipment – those free weights might as well be posted online for free so someone else can come get them out of your way. The amount of times you’ve stubbed your toe on them just doesn’t make it worth it.